Smitten
by Jewls13
Summary: Just a short piece reflecting what I think is running through Rory's mind after the first two eps of this season


Disclaimer-I own nothing  
Song-Smitten by Bree Sharp  
  
just my two cents of what Rory is feeling after the first two eps.  
  
  
  
  
//You put your face in front of mine  
All but hiding desperation  
Hunger leaks out of your eyes  
Whetting me with dark temptation  
  
All I want, all I want is to hold you  
Instead I hold my breath....//  
  
when I saw him with her, I wasn't sure what to think. I mean, I had just gotten home and there they were. This blond thing plastered all over his face. What was she doing there? Well, I could see what she was doing there, but why? This wasn't supposed to happen. Not like this. He wasn't supposed to be here with some girl, he was supposed to wait for me. I kissed him. I kissed him and didn't talk to him for weeks, how could he just move on? I couldn't. This isn't fair. Why couldn't he wait for me to make a decision. He came back for me, didn't he? He was supposed to wait.   
  
  
//Sickened by the season, I am smitten with you  
Saddled with this treason, I am smitten with you  
(hey, hey, hey)  
  
In a dimly lighted bar  
We sit while Conscience pours another  
And she is home, and she is waiting  
She my friend, she your lover//  
  
  
The stink of it is, that I know I'm wrong. From day one, I've been wrong. All those times that Dean accused me of liking Jess, all those times that I told Dean he was being to protective. He had a right to be suspicious. He was right. Maybe he saw what I wouldn't let myself see. That I was falling for Jess. Mom saw it too. Why couldn't I? This all just got out of control. By the time I realized what I was feeling, I was already running away from him. "Welcome Home" I said. What else was I supposed to say? Please don't let me run? Make me stay? Don't let me make this mistake again....what was I supposed to do?  
  
//I can hear the angels on your shoulder  
And the devil on your lips  
  
And I'm sickened by the season, I am smitten with you  
Saddled with this treason, I am smitten with you//  
  
  
I ran, again. God, I did that when Dean kissed me-Tristan too. What is wrong with me?  
Then at the market..you were right, about everything. I didn't call you, although I wanted to. I didn't write to you, even though I tried. I didn't know what to say, what was I supposed to tell you? I didn't know what to think, I still don't. I thought, that if I could just get a little distance that I could work this out. I thought that when I got home, I'd still have Dean loving me and you waiting. But you didn't wait. Why couldn't you have waited? You're supposed to know me. You're supposed to see me, why couldn't you just know how I felt? Why couldn't you just know that I needed time? the same way you seem to know everything else. Why?  
  
  
//You can read me like a trashy book  
I'm barely keeping in these rages  
So far so clean, but I'm torn between, see, I'm torn between  
These pages, pages//  
  
  
Seeing you with her-Shane. It made me sick. I never thought about you with anyone else before. When ever you came into my head it was always it relation to me-no one else. Do you like her? Do you love her, do you care about her at all? Does she know your favorite color? your favorite book? Does she know you like I......I don't know you. I just realized that, I don't know anything about you. Other then, you like dirty water dogs, The Clash, Hemingway and me. At least I thought you did. I know that you need cones, that you hate school, and that when you look into my eyes-you seem to reach a part of me that I haven't ever shared before. you see me. You know me. So why couldn't you know that I needed time. Why couldn't you have waited?  
  
  
//You put your face in front of mine  
And breathed a wordless conversation  
Good intentions, true regret  
Cannot eclipse love's desperation//  
  
  
I'm angry and I'm hurt. But please don't stay away. Don't let me run away again.   
  
//And I'm sickened by the season, I am smitten with you  
Saddled with this treason, I am smitten with you  
I am smitten with you  
I am smitten with you  
(hey, hey, hey)//


End file.
